Life can be hard, but it can also be beautiful. That’s the thing about living in a fallen world: We get glimpses of Heaven, but we also get the weight of sin. The hard things don’t dismiss the fact that God is good, but those things are still hard and we feel the weight of them. That’s why we should look towards what is to come: It’s a place with no more tears or sorrow (for those who have put their trust in Jesus). But until then, we are called to fight the good fight, through the ups and the downs, and trust God with it all.

Matthew 18:21-35... I’ve read this passage many times, and the last verse always scared me.

“…And should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant, as I had mercy on you?’ And in anger his master delivered him to the jailers, until he should pay all his debt. So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart.”

I tend to hold grudges (or at least I used to a lot more than I do now), “So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother (or sister) from your heart.”

Jesus wasn't called to just die on the cross and Christians are not called to just modify their behavior. We’re called to humility and obedience, which leads to lasting change, change that in turn helps us to do/say the right things.

I didn’t choose my over-analytical mind, but I’ve learned to cope with the way my brain processes. I push the thoughts away that say, “It’ll never happen for us” or “you’re just going to have to be okay with the fact that it’s going to take years before you conceive and in turn y'all are going to be old parents”. I know these thoughts are over-dramatic. I’m aware that we’re only 27 and 30 years old (or “Young” as people say). I’m also aware that we haven’t even been trying to conceive long enough to justify these fears, but it doesn’t change the fact that the thoughts have crossed my mind. I try to stop them in their tracks, but sometimes it also helps to just acknowledge, in writing, that the fears have been there.

Do things get done more efficiently (or maybe just completed at all) if you do them yourself, yet you're exhausted and wish someone could help? Do you receive your self-worth from your accomplishments? In other words, if you do a lot of things well, do you think you're loved because of these things?

How can we pray in faith if we're not absolutely certain that what we're asking for is in accordance to the will of God?

About a month after my now fiancé and I started dating, we were on the phone one night when he got really quiet. I asked him what was wrong and he said, “I just don’t understand how a beautiful, godly, single woman like you would be interested in a guy like me.” I proceeded to ask him what that even meant, so he answered, “You’re pure, but I have this dirty stain on me that I can’t get off.” My heart sank when I heard those words come out of his mouth because I knew he was referring to his divorce, so I asked him, “What’s the point of the cross?” All I heard was a sigh of relief, followed by him saying, “You have no idea how much that simple statement just did for me.”

One day when I was on Twitter I scrolled past a tweet that had been “Retweeted” and “Liked” by multiple people, specifically girls. I bet you can guess what it said by the title of this post. The tweet read, “I’d rather be single than date online.”

My initial reaction was to get defensive (those of you who know me know that I met my fiancé online). Then I realized that I probably would have been one of the people who retweeted and liked that post not even a year ago. I quickly realized that my defensiveness is caused by my own insecurity about what people think.

As I laid in my bed early this morning and couldn't go back to sleep, I decided to start writing. My journal caught my tears and I fought to recall truth instead of believing lies about how I wasn't good enough. I honestly wasn't sure if I wanted to share this as I’m still in the middle of this difficult season, but if it can help others and bring glory to God through it, it's worth it.

Without going into detail, I lost someone who I thought was going to be in my life for a long time. It was a peaceful ending and  our relationship needed to be over, but that doesn't mean it’s been easy. I wrote the letter below as if God were speaking directly to me. If you are reading this, I'd like you to read it as if He is speaking directly to you, especially if you are going through a season of grief as well.