Rae’s Birth Story
Let me just start by saying that if birth pictures or stories freak you out, this probably isn't the blog post for you. All the pictures are PG of course, but fair warning! ;)
I want to preface this post by saying that I wanted a natural birth, but if you asked me if I wanted that a couple years prior, I would have told you no way. After doing A TON of research, I was/am convinced that a natural birth is what was best for my body and my baby. Please do not think that I am saying I think a natural birth is for everyone or that I don't think medical interventions are necessary and good sometimes. For me, this was just what I felt was best.
With that, I knew I'd need a doula (or birth coach if you don't know what that is). Thankfully, an amazing lady from my church said she would be that for me as she had two natural births and specialized in Women's Health. SHE WAS AMAZING. If you're considering a natural birth and are not sure where to start, send me a message because I have another good friend who is doula certified and taking new clients ;) So here's how it all went down...
A year ago today, I was getting into bed PRAYING this baby girl would come on her own before we were scheduled to go in for an induction the next evening (we were a week past our due date at this point and I was over it). Anyways, the next morning around 6:15am I went to the bathroom and then laid back down in the bed. Then I felt a double pop in my lady part, to which I braced for my water breaking... But nothing happened. I stood up and went back to the bathroom and then experienced my first contraction. I got my tracking app out and at 6:28am I tracked my second contraction (I was still trying to determine if these really were contractions). They started coming every 6 minutes and lasting anywhere from 50 seconds - 1.5 minutes each time. I texted my doula and she said to get ready because it sounds like labor.
After the 3rd or 4th contraction came and went, I woke Justin up and told him that I thought we were in labor, to which he said “Nah” and rolled back over. 😂 In his defense, I was having a lot of pre-labor signs for a couple weeks before that and we were tired from staying up late the night before. I obviously convinced him to start getting ready while I grabbed some breakfast knowing I'd need something in my stomach for the day ahead. After eating some cereal I showered and began concentrating on my breathing and relaxing, thinking we’d be laboring at home for a few hours (since it was my first delivery).
Nope, within 30 minutes my contractions became so intense and so close together (maybe 30 second breaks in-between at this point) that I literally kept dropping to my hands and knees and screaming for Justin to put counter pressure on my back. I remember after Justin got done throwing everything in the car and I had another contraction, he then asked, "Should we go?" To which I answered quickly, "Yes!"
Note, one of my fears was that we'd get to the hospital and get turned away for not being "Far enough along", which was another reason we were planning to labor at home for as long as possible.
The contractions didn't stop the entire way to the hospital, but I was managing them fairly well. Once we pulled up, I remember coming off a contraction and looking up at the entry doors to Labor and Delivery (as you can see in all my pics, I had my head down and eyes closed during every contraction because I couldn't do anything else in those moments). I saw a man smoking directly outside the doors and all I could think was that I had to just make it into the doors before another contraction hit (I didn't want to drop to my hands and knees in front of some strange man smoking, let alone breath in the smoke). So Justin started walking me up and half way there I thought, "Oh no, another one is already coming on." BUT, I pushed myself inside the doors before I inevitably dropped to hands and knees again. Once I was able to stand again, we get up the elevator. It was outside regular business hours, so I had to page the Labor and Delivery nurses outside the locked doors. I remember trying not to laugh when they said over the intercom, "Can we help you?" "Uhhhhh yeah, I'm in labor (though I was still in disbelief that it was already here)... They opened the door and I began walking down what seemed like the longest hallways I've ever been in. Of course I was only half way down the hallway before I was down again. The nurses at the other end said, "Oh she's on the ground..." to which I was thinking, "Of course I'm on the ground, I'm having a baby!" Lol
Once this contraction ended, a nurse had a wheelchair waiting for me and she wheeled me back to a room. Once I got there my nurse-midwife checked me and said I was at 5cm. When I heard that I breathed a breath of relief and said, "So you're not sending me home?" Everyone in the room laughed and she said, "Oh no sweetie, you're having a baby today."
At this point my doula showed up (she was seriously a God-send) and Justin went to park the car and bring in all our stuff (speaker for calming music, heating pad, essential oils, diffuser, etc). I remember saying I was going to be sick, so they got me a barf bag and I lost my breakfast. Then I thought I had to pee (false alarm)... Labor is weird yall. From there, I just started getting more and more in tune with my body and relaxing through each wave of the process. Crazy that I really never questioned going forward with my natural birth plan because I figured I'd get to a point where I'd cave for the epidural. One of the things that kept me afloat was the diluted laughing gas mixed with oxygen you see me with in some of the pictures. It was better than gold during my contractions, though apparently most women who try it say it did nothing for them.
At this point I transitioned to the birthing ball off the side of the bed as I continued through my labor. Both my double and nurse-midwife were in unbelief with how long my contractions were lasting with such little time in-between. I kept thinking, "I thought I was suppose to get longer breaks." Though there was one time that I got about a 2.5 minute break and it was exactly what I needed to keep going.
After laboring on the side of the bed, I measured at 7cm and opted to get in the tub for my desired water birth. Shortly after I got in the tub I thought I was peeing myself, but come to find out that it was actually my water breaking.
Not long after that, while still in the tub, I literally felt my pelvic region opening up and baby girl's head dropping. Gross I know, but true. I honestly thought I was going to, well, loose it (that's the PG version). I MIGHT have screamed F*** a couple of times followed by punching the side of the tub (if you know me, you know that word is not a part of my normal vocabulary).
Soon after this short stent and going from 7cm to 10cm (in just over 30 minutes), my body started to push. I told everyone in the room that I was pushing and they told me to stop because "There was no way I could already be at 10 cm." At that point my nurse-midwife came in to check on me before she was going to go into a scheduled cesarean for someone else. I told her to check me and she rolled her eyes (again not believing I could already be at 10 cm), but did it anyways. Then there was a pause before she said, "Well keep pushing, you're at a 10!" I responded, "I knew it! I knew it! I knew it!" So we started trying to get baby girl earth side.
Protocol at this point is to check the baby's heart rate, to which they found out that during every contraction, her heart rate was dropping. My nurse-midwife then said, "Lori, if you don't get this baby out during the next contraction, we're going to have to get out of the tub." I REALLY didn't want to get out of the tub, but the next contraction came and went and baby girl was not coming out.
At this point they lifted me out of the tub and with my doula on one side and Justin on the other, they had me walk (yes, you heard that correctly, walk) to the bed in the connecting room. Talk about painful and weird. Plus, the muscle in my right inner thigh was cramping so I could hardly put any weight on my right leg as I walked.
Anyways, I jumped on the edge of the bed hands and knees, and they told me to scoot up, but I shook my head no because I felt paralyzed and I also couldn't talk. I tried to speak to communicate that I couldn't move up, but no words were coming out. Justin then whispered in my ear to move up (apparently my nurse-midwife was holding my butt so I wouldn't fall off the bed) and I then somehow got the strength to crawl up the bed.
Unfortunately, baby girl's heart rate continued to drop and her head was stuck in the birth canal (crowning, but stuck nonetheless). My nurse-midwife told me she was going to have to cut me, to which I thought she meant cesarean at the time, which really made me mad since I had done so much work up to that point. But, next thing I know, I'm getting a shot of lidocaine down there (that is no joke yall) and the nurse-midwife does her thing, which allows baby girl to come on the next push! I guess right before this moment every single nurse in Labor and Delivery had run into my room too. Justin told me he just stepped out of the way when they all came running in because he didn't have anywhere to stand and felt as though he was in the way. Thankfully, baby girl was okay and the extra nurses left the room shortly after she came out crying.
In the moment that she came out, all the pain ceased, yes immediately, and I was just relieved. They tried to put her on my chest, but I screamed because her umbilical cord was so short. They had to drop her on my pelvis since that's the furthest the cord would reach. Justin cut the cord after a short stint of delayed cord clamping because they needed to check her vitals. As they carried her over to the baby station another nurse that was still in the room leaned over and told me that my baby was going to be okay. Then I laid my head back and thought, "Thank God. It's over."
I had imagined this sweet moment with an immediate bond when she finally got here, but as Justin says, "I was in shock." They brought her back to me skin-to-skin for a bit after they determined she was okay (these are the pictures where I just look so out of it). Shortly after, I had Justin hold her for almost 30 minutes because I was taking in the fact that I actually did it and there was no longer a baby inside of me. Relieved and just wanting to enjoy me being me without a baby inside was an understatement.
To wrap this up, because I could make a long story longer, I took Rae back into my arms once I had that short time to take in everything that had just happened and we attempted to start breastfeeding. That became its own journey and a story for another time (it was NOT an easy start for us). Shortly after that, our parents came into the room to meet her for the first time (first grand baby for both sides of the family).
When my parents came in, they ended up telling me that that was the same exact room that I was delivered in. Like what?!? Rae was born in the same exact room I was born in 28 years previously. I mean, I knew I was born in the same hospital, but that's crazy! Also, Rae and I both weighed 7 lbs 12 oz, but she beat me by half an inch in height!
If you're thinking about having a natural birth, it was the hardest, yet best and most rewarding thing I have ever done. I'd love to share more with you one-on-one or be a support system if you ever need. It's worth it all and somehow, I'll opt to do it again one day (God willing).
